It’s not that easy to spot verbal abuse in relationships because it is often camouflaged by “Oh baby you know I love you so much” kind of things.
It’s important to know the right meaning of verbal abuse so that you don’t mistake your other half’s real intention as being abusive.
So how do you know when you’re REALLY being verbally abused?
Well firstly you being confused and/ or hurt to the point where you’re searching for examples of verbal abuse on Google is the first sign that you could be suffering from it. Note that I said “could” and NOT confirming that you are.
To confirm that you are for sure suffering from verbal abuse in your relationship, you will need to read the examples on this post and analyse how it relates to your love life and the frequency of the abuse in your relationship.
Remember, if you have only experienced verbal abuse in your relationship once in a blue moon during a massive argument or something, this does not mean your partners intention was to abuse you with his or her words. It could just be that they let their emotions roll of the mountain at that point but he or she probably loves you to bits for real.
Nobody is perfect. We all have our weak moments and our ways with words at times where we just let any word slip out of our mouth like we don’t care one bit about how it’s going to affect the person hearing it. The reason I mention this is so that you don’t by any chance, really misunderstand your spouse as being ‘verbally abusive’.
Read through these examples and see where you fit in. These types of verbal abuse can happen both private and publicly.
NO 1: Constant Insults/Comparing
“Even my grandma has less wrinkles than you.”
“You look like a talking whale in that dress.”
“Errr don’t come near me with your acne face.”
“My mood goes away when I see those stretch marks on your belly”
“Why didn’t you wear braces? My ex-girlfriend had really beautiful teeth.”
As you can see, the 5 examples of verbal insult above are not something you could easily pull off as a joke to someone, especially to someone you (supposed to) love. If your partner is constantly insulting your appearance, calling you names and then tells you that you have no sense of humor, this is nothing other than verbal abuse.
NO 2: Harsh Sarcasm
It is verbal abuse if he or she is constantly telling you sarcastic jokes like “I like the sound you make when your mouth is shut.”?
We all love to LOL at sarcastic humors when we come across them but it is no longer humorous when this so called sarcastic humor ends up hurting one’s feelings badly. If your husband, wife, boyfriend or girlfriend is constantly making sarcastic remarks that really hurts your feelings, it can be considered as verbal abuse.
NO 3: You’re wrong all the time, period!
Another great example of verbal abuse in relationships is when he or she not only blames you for everything but they would also make you feel bad enough to take the blame even when you know it wasn’t your fault.
NO 4: I’m going to leave you threat
If this happens rarely during huge arguments, that is not necessarily a verbal abuse but if he or she threatens to leave you for every little thing so that you can do whatever they want, you know what that means!
NO 5: Swearing and screaming
If you always find yourself in a position where you feel like your eardrums could start bleeding any second because of the volume of swearing and screaming by your spouse, this is verbal abuse. It’s even bad when you’re being screamed and sweared at for things that weren’t even your fault.
I’d like to remind you all once again that all these types of verbal abuse can happen in perfectly healthy relationships too and it only becomes a hazard sign when it simply doesn’t stop. So ask yourselves how often you have to experience these types of verbal abuse and make an effort to talk to your partner about it.
You know what will be worse than going through verbal abuse in your relationship?
It is if and when your spouse fails to realize what they did wrong and continues with the verbal abuse like it’s nothing. If this happens to you, make sure you take appropriate action to find the peace you deserve. Perhaps you could talk to a relationship advice counselor if you think that would make any difference. Or else, you should seek a break or a break up from this person depending on how bad/frequent he or she has been verbally abusing you.
Which one of these examples of verbal abuse can you relate to?