Love relationships are one of the most tremendous sources of happiness and fulfillment that human beings can experience, but they can also cause long-lasting feelings of regret, disappointment, and sadness.
When we are growing up, we hear about fairytale endings – and we assume that everything ends “happily ever after”.
Just because fairytales end with the prince and princess riding off into the sunset in their carriage doesn’t mean that real-life relationships stay perfect.
The best fairytale stories didn’t have sequels that let readers or movie-going audiences peer into the frustrations, disappointments, and conflicts of what married life can really be like. There aren’t a whole lot of fairytales that show what it really takes to keep love and faithfulness alive for the long haul.
According to the latest research, over 40% of first marriages and 60% of second marriages don’t work out, and the divorce rate is only going up.
Now, more than ever, couples need to apply the latest psychological research and take advantage of the wealth of material gathered by researchers, counselors, and psychologists in the last several decades. Reading this article is a good place to start. Keep reading for some practical tips on how to hold a relationship together.
NO 1: Respect the other person’s boundaries:When you are talking with your partner, share information about yourself, what you’ve done wrong, and how you would like to deal with situations differently in the future. Do not go over the line and start talking about your partner, assume what he or she is thinking or feeling, or tell him or her what to do. There is a very high likelihood that your partner will just hear accusations, criticism, and blame – even if you feel you are pointing out clear problems that he or she has caused. If you have to discuss something your partner is doing that is bothering you, then start the issue off with, “I feel…” rather than “You are…”.
NO 2: Don’t discuss your issues when emotions are flying high:When emotions run high, and snap decisions are made, relationships can abruptly end. It may be tempting to respond angrily to your partner when he or she is itching for a fight, but be the bigger person and take a break to go see a movie or take a long walk. If your emotions are running high, take a short break and get back to talking when you’ve both returned to a better mood. Sometimes, it’s better to talk about things in the morning over breakfast after a good night’s sleep. Everything looks better after a good night’s sleep.