Does waking up to a knock on the door or a phone call from your mother in law feel like a nightmare? You don’t want to have anything to do with her whatsoever because she seems so “errrrgh annoying”?
These tips are for you if you’re in a position where you haven’t done (you think so) anything wrong to her but she simply won’t stop getting on your nerves.
Also Read: 10 Tips to be a Good Wife to Your Husband
Remember, these are tips to help you bond with your mother in law and not things that will make her hate you (more if she already does).
NO 1: Mentally prepare yourself to stop seeing her as Monster in Law.
You have to understand one major fact here, she is the mother of your husband. He loves her no matter what and he will always love her. If it wasn’t because of her, you wouldn’t have even met your husband.
How much do you love him? If you love him with all your heart, you need to be able to love his loved ones also.
Sure, you can’t please everyone in this world but people like his mother and father are individuals you have to learn to bond with somehow.
Unless she hates you to the point where she wants to hurt you physically, you need to accept her as an important person in your heart. We do all kinds of things for people we care about right?
Just imagine how happy and peaceful you’d feel when your mother in law starts treating you like her own daughter? You can make it happen if you’re willing to make some efforts for it.
NO 2: Understand that he was her son before he became your husband.
Has your husband by any chance forgotten to give her the respect and love she used to get from him before he married you? If he did, she’s going to think it was because of you.
Of course she’d want her son to be happy with his wife but no mother can share her part of love with anyone else.
If he has been ignoring her wishes or not paying much attention to her as he used to, the blame is going to come on you.
Sometimes he might still be the same as he used to be but she will test once in a while to see where she stands. She wants to know who is more important to him now. Your mother in law might have started to see you as her competition and what you need to do is to avoid doing things that could make her feel like that.
NO 3: Compliment her and point out her positives to others.
This can be real hard if your mother in law constantly gives you snarky comments or looks for ways to cause you trouble but you can turn her to be like a mother if you be patient with her.
You need to show her you love her too even if she doesn’t get along with you at the moment.
NO 4: Start seeing her like another mother.
This is probably the last thing you want to do right now but trust me, it will work if you can put it into action.
If your mum does things that makes you angry or annoyed, you might get mad at her but you will never stop loving your mother right? Apply this to the relationship you have with your mother in law and see how she changes for the good.
Shower her with some sweet daughterly love from time to time. Check up on her health if she is not feeling well and be nice to her.
Did you know enemies who become friends can be more loving and faithful than some friends who backstab?
Be patient with her and treat her like your own mother. She will start loving you sooner than you think.
NO 5: Pay attention to things that matter to her.
Her own children are probably all grown up and busy with their own lives. This is the perfect time for you as a daughter in law to shine your best characteristics to her.
Make an effort to get to know her likes/dislikes and put them into practice whenever you get the chance to.
Even if she doesn’t appreciate you to your face, she will love you in her heart.
NO 6: Give her unexpected happy surprises.
She probably thinks you will be the last person to care about her birthday or wedding anniversary. Prove her wrong! Give her a happy surprise on her birthday with something she would love and buy sweet gifts for her from time to time.
NO 7: Never allow your children to have negative opinions about her.
Kids are honest and open. What you speak in front of them is what they will learn about their grandmother. Tell them good things about her instead of the bad things so some day when she hears it from them, she will be so happy about how much you respect and love her.
These tips aren’t going to turn her into a sweet person to you in 1 day but if you stick with them, you will see her changing day by day.